National New Friends Day

A Social Adventure

Making new friends as an adult can sometimes feel like trying to assemble IKEA furniture without the instructions—awkward, confusing, and occasionally ending with you wanting to throw something across the room. Yet, it’s one of the most rewarding things we do in life. National New Friends Day, celebrated annually on October 19th, encourages us to step out of our comfort zones and embrace the art of friendship-making.

From the early days of childhood playdates to adulthood’s slightly more sophisticated coffee meetups, forging new bonds is a skill we develop throughout our lives. The challenge? As adults, most of us don’t have the safety net of recess or shared nap time to break the ice.

Social science has plenty to say about the benefits of friendships, both old and new. Research shows that friendships improve mental health, decrease stress, and even help us live longer. That’s right, your friends could be the key to eternal youth—so long as they’re not the ones suggesting tequila shots on a Tuesday night.

Forming new friendships also keeps your brain sharp. The cognitive effort involved in learning about someone new, remembering their quirks, and understanding their backstory keeps your mind engaged. Plus, you get to broaden your horizons, gain new perspectives, and maybe even find someone who finally agrees that pineapple on pizza is not the culinary crime some claim it to be.

The Science of Friendship

Humans are social creatures. We’re hardwired to form connections with others—it’s part of our evolutionary survival toolkit. Back in the caveman days, having friends meant there were more people to help fight off predators or share the last woolly mammoth burger. These days, our survival needs may have shifted, but the social wiring remains intact.

A study published in the journal Science found that friendships trigger the release of oxytocin, also known as the “love hormone,” which boosts feelings of trust and bonding. In short, making a new friend is like getting a little hit of happiness with every shared laugh or inside joke. It’s nature’s way of rewarding us for being social butterflies (or at least attempting to be).

How to Celebrate National New Friends Day

Making new friends doesn’t have to be a high-stakes social endeavor with small talk so forced it feels like an Olympic sport. Here are some fun, low-pressure ways to embrace the day and maybe even leave with a new pal or two:

1. Join a Group or Class: Whether it’s a yoga class, a book club, or an amateur trivia team, shared activities make it easier to connect with others. Plus, if the conversation gets awkward, you can always default to discussing how you both have no idea what downward-facing dog is supposed to feel like.

2. Be the Initiator: Sometimes, the best way to make new friends is to simply take the plunge and introduce yourself. Channel your inner social pioneer and strike up a conversation with someone new. Pro tip: “How about this weather?” is universally accepted as a non-threatening way to start.

3. Attend Social Events: If you’re feeling brave, step out to a social event where you know nobody. It could be a work happy hour, a community gathering, or even an online game night. Sure, it may be a bit uncomfortable at first, but remember—every friendship starts with that awkward first conversation.

4. Reconnect with Acquaintances: Sometimes, new friends are just old acquaintances you haven’t fully bonded with yet. Reach out to someone you met at a party, work, or event and suggest grabbing coffee or attending an activity together. Who knows, they might be just as eager to deepen the connection!

The Perks of New Friendships

While it’s great to have long-time friends who know all your quirks (and embarrassing stories), new friends bring a fresh perspective to life. They may introduce you to new hobbies, different music, or a new favorite restaurant. Plus, they haven’t heard that same story you’ve told every single one of your old friends for the past five years—so, they’re guaranteed to laugh the first time.

New friendships can also be energizing. Think about it—when was the last time you were excited to meet someone new? That energy can be contagious, giving you a boost in your everyday life. And there’s something wonderfully refreshing about having a conversation that’s free from shared past baggage.

Let’s not sugarcoat it—meeting new friends can sometimes feel a lot like dating. You’re both trying to figure each other out, there’s nervous laughter, and you might even wonder if you’re coming off as too eager or not interested enough. If you suggest hanging out for a second time, it can feel like you’re navigating relationship territory.

But unlike dating, the stakes are lower with potential friends. The goal is to have fun, share some laughs, and see if you vibe. Worst-case scenario? You realize the other person is more into interpretive dance than you are, and you both part ways amicably.

Friendships Across the Ages

Making friends as an adult is a bit different than when we were kids. Back then, all you had to do was ask someone, “Wanna play?” Now, there’s a little more nuance involved—though, to be fair, asking someone to join your trivia team isn’t that far off from “Wanna play?”

Interestingly, researchers have found that our ability to make friends doesn’t necessarily decrease as we age. It’s just that our social circles tend to stabilize once we hit adulthood, and we’re less likely to put ourselves out there. National New Friends Day reminds us that it’s never too late to expand our circle, even if the thought of “making friends” feels a bit like a distant memory.

Friend or Foe? First Impressions Matter

Psychologists agree that first impressions are important when it comes to making new friends. It takes about seven seconds to form an impression of someone when you meet them, and within those seven seconds, your brain is deciding if this is a person you’d like to grab a drink with—or avoid at all future social gatherings. No pressure!

But don’t worry too much about those initial interactions. While first impressions set the stage, it’s the follow-up that builds real friendships. As they say, consistency is key—even if that consistency is just texting them memes every other day.

National New Friends Day is the perfect opportunity to break out of your social bubble and forge new connections. Whether you’re looking to meet people who share your love of gardening, or simply seeking someone who’s also addicted to murder mystery podcasts, new friends can bring fresh energy and fun into your life. And who knows, your next great friendship could be just around the corner—possibly standing awkwardly near the chips at your next party.

So, go forth and embrace the magic of new friendships. And remember, it’s not about how many friends you have, but about the quality of the connections you build along the way. After all, as every adult knows, life is more fun when you’ve got someone to laugh with about how complicated assembling IKEA furniture really is.

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